COMET KANSAS : A ROCK OPERA
M A T A R A T A
Charles Laurel , Eric Muhs , R. Micheal Torrey
WITH MARGARET SPILKER, JOEE CONROY, & TOM HERRING
EARTHSIDE :
1) Comet Warning
Far from the Earth, out beyond the Oort cloud
hurtling in the emptiness that lurks between the stars
Cold beyond cold lies the Comet Kansas,
destined to intersect this lovely world of ours.
Prograde revolution, random inclination,
just a frozen dust ball in the solar wind.
Cosmic evolution, an overnight sensation,
Call up the weekly star and tell them how you've sinned.
2) U R A Spaceman
The moon is up there, far away. No-one has been there yet.
But someone will go there soon. Someday you may go there, too.
This is how you will go to the moon. Here is the rocket that will
take you into space.
Come on, come on in. Come into this little room.
This is where you will sit. You will sit with the rocket men.
The men will show you what to do. The men will show you where
to sit.
Hook on that belt. Hook on tight. Get set to go.
Boom ! At last ! The rocket's off, and you are in it.
Open your belt. Up you go ! You cannot stay down. You do not fall.
You are a spaceman now.
Come into the space station. Come into the ring part.
Things do stay down here. You will stay down, too. It's a lot
more like home here.
There are things to do here. You can eat or sleep. You can see
a show.
You are a spaceman now.
3) Amen
Now, you are surely wondering how difficult it might be for your
congregation to learn all this new music. Learning so much music
would usually be difficult. But this is the kind of music which
learns easily. Let's see why. A composer is a craftsman. Like
a carpenter, he builds with his work. The carpenter, whether he
builds a cabinet, or a house, uses wood. The musical composer,
whether he writes a song or an entire mass, uses a few simple
materials. The carpenter cuts and shapes his wood to suit his
blueprint. The composer shapes his musical material to fit the
sense and structure of the text.When the composer of a mass is
shaping, he must bring out the full meaning of the text. It must
realize the mystery of the liturgy whose intention is to render
glory to God and sanctify the host. Let's illustrate. Amen. Lord
Have Mercy. Lord God, Heavenly Being, Lord God Father Almighty.
Just as a carpenter uses more than one kind of wood, the composer
of a large work needs more than one kind of material.
4) WKANB
This is WKANB, 66.6 on your AM dial, the voice of Kansas.
You've been listening to Reverend Tom McBane's "Ticket to
Heaven" show.
Don't forget to send in your 5 bucks for your own personal ticket
to heaven.
Before that you heard "Someday You Will..." , sponsored
by Skyway Soap,
the soap as pure as the sky. Be sure to tune in next week for
the next episode,
"You Will Go To Dentistry School."
And now, the KANB News Headlines.
This is Roger Rocketman for KANB News.
Headline : Storm door opens. Hopes rise for end of drought.
Headline : Global warming trend may be bleaching corals.
Anti-nuke stand means lost Borons.
Headline : Kansas Quarterback suffered a minor decapitation, is
expected to start
next week against Kenya.
And now for Local News with Lester B. Snurg.
Samantha Adams, who disappeared last week, was last seen with
a hairy little man named Jake. Her picture will be featured on
milk cartons nationwide.
Our congratulations to Samantha.
Our Headline deadline today :
Comet ball Kansas strikes backward rushed crowds to the state
all over the world.
The mighty Oort cloud dropped a mighty methane egg.
Selling skyhooks by the acre, they're waiting for a kind of prophet.
Peeking, poking, puking, parking, creepy, breathing, teething,
seething,
Gnashing, flashing, cashing, waxing, iceball, beachball, waxball,
softball.
And now for a word from our sponsor.
This is Roger Rocketman on location in Phillipsburg, Kansas,
The site scientists say where mighty comet named Kansas will pass.
The streets are quiet. The night is empty, but at the end of the
block, there's a light. Let's go down there and see what's going
on down at the general store.
5) Big Lester B. Snurg's General Store
Well, come on in to the general store !
You'll find whatever you need & a whole lot more.
My name is Big Lester B. Snurg, and I own the only store in all
Phillipsburg.
Yep, it's a little tiny town with only one street.
Hey, there, don't be cold ! Come in ! Wipe your feet ! Warm yourself
up here !
This is Kansas in winter ! Now we're a small town here, but we're
close to the center
Of the whole state of Kansas & everything round us.
Got your cameras and recorders ? Well, I'm glad that you found
us!
Well, you're right for sure, tomorrow's the big day.
That old comet Kansas' gonna carry us away,
Lock, stock, & barrel, the whole general store.
But that old comet don't know what's in store.
I have manufactured, to strictest specifications,
A mighty skyhook, my brand new invention.
For $ 6.95, you can own one and face up to the sky,
And grab that old comet as it floats on by.
If you duck, you won't get hit. It'll stay six feet high.
Watch me with my hook in the comet as we start to fly.
Up, Up, & Away with my comet as we take to the sky.
6) Tourists From Perth
Me & the wife - that's her, mate - come all the way from Perth
From down under just to see the greatest sight on earth.
We've been all around the world & to New England, too.
We really don't live anywhere. We're just passing through.
We've been to see the Pyramids. Sailed halfway up the Nile.
But Kansas is the flattest place we've been in quite a while.
They say that comet's coming close, maybe close enough to touch.
The wife, she says it's just a rock, but she don't know.
I've brought along the videocam, the kids'll love the show.
We'll invite all the neighbors when we get back down below.
7) Moment of Destiny
We wait with our skyhooks pointing east !
That shiny, icy ball draweth nigh !
Deliver us, O KANSAS ! Deliver us
From this world of sin and commercialism !
He delivereth us from on high!
This is our moment of destiny !
This is our moment of truth !
He raiseth us up from our mediocrity !
Granteth us the enlightenment of his vision !
Gathereth us into his all embracing arms !
Kisseth us upon our brows !
We rusheth forward with blinding intensity !
He burneth the soot and ashes from our souls !
8) ARRIVAL / DEPARTURE
In Which The Fiery Iceball Does the Gravity-Grab On Those Who
Await, Zooming O'er
the Wavy Fields of Grain at a Height of Two Cubits, and Sails
Away on the Solar Winds.
COMETSIDE :
9) Methane Snowman
Whoa, here I am off on a comet just like Jules Verne said.
It's not as cold as I thought, a little windy. There's rocks &
ice.
Be a good place to make a methane snowman.
I don't feel that cold & I'm not that hot.
I'm just about right.
God, who could've believed this could ever happen to me ?
Think I'll walk over... Hey that's Mike & Charlie ! Hey guys
!
Wanna make a methane snowman with me ?
That's pretty cool. Well, let's go walk around & see if there's
anyone else here.
10) Sustaining Without Sustenance
breathing breathing empty air believing believing without bleeding
seeing only starlight starlight without stars no wind no breeze
no stirring wings
voices dream in empty wells sustaining without sustenance
moving in slow motion in liquid light gravity no resistance remote
existence
moving without muscles walking through the stars
feeling feeling fingers grasping comet starlit sand sustaining
without sustenance
sleeping sleeping without fear dreaming dreaming empty days
waking without hunger lightning without thunder dogs without masters
hair without scissors feet without toenails sighs without eyes
tears without sadness floating without paddles sustaining without
sustenance death without mourning nights without darkness tides
without oceans.
11) Welcome To Heaven
Welcome to heaven, son ! You must be a chosen one.
I'm sure there's more to come, to greet their god & holy son.
Do you think that's where we are ? Empty night without a star.
I expected something more, streets of gold and diamond shores.
Patience, patience, patience, boy ! Your heart should be full
of joy !
Hours are but drops in the sea. The ocean is eternity.
Just the same, I'm not so sure. I can't say that I've been pure,
Hardly ever went to mass, gave a few coins but not much cash.
Our great God is merciful. Our new life is a miracle.
Shall we kneel & pray ? Wait for the others on their way ?
Go ahead, sir, that's OK. I want to look around this place.
By the way, what's your name ? Don't I recognize your face ?
Reverend Tom, Tom McBane. Tell me, son, have you been saved ?
Cast out doubt and fear of flame ! Join the righteous in His Name.
Yes, I saw you on T.V. I heard you preach on KWANB.
I was looking for my team. Football is my Sunday theme.
I'm beginning to understand who will rise and who'll be damned
Will be decided in this place. Won't you kneel and receive his
grace ?
Thank you, sir, but that's OK. I really must be on my way.
What you're saying doesn't make much sense. If you're so sure,
let's place some bets.
Are you Satan in disguise, come to rob me of my prize,
To tempt me in this final hour ? Begone, for I resist your power
!
There's lots more folk for me to meet on this ball of rocky sleet.
I leave you in this icy place with guilt and fear etched in your
face.
12) Milk Carton Kids
Have you seen me ? I'm 3 foot 2 & my eyes are blue.
I was last seen in Timbuktu with a hairy little man names Jake
Have you seen me ? I'm six years old. I'm lost and cold.
I never could do what I was told, and now I've run away.
We're the kids on paper bags & supermarket baskets.
We're the kids you never see again.
We'll show up in body bags with numbered tags.
It's such a drag to be a Milk Carton Kid.
Have you seen me ? In '64 I went out the door
on my way to the corner store, & I haven't been heard from
since.
Have you seen me ? In '85, I was still alive
When a nice young man took me for a drive,
and the rest would make you wince.
13) Telepathic Communion
Oooh. Ooooh. Ooooh. Oh. Oooooooh. Ooooooooooh Oh. Oh. Ooooh. Oooooooh.
Oooh.
( This is the pivotal song in the story where all the loose ends
are tied together, and important questions on everyone's mind
are answered, such as " Are the milk carton kids on the comet
and a part of the story, are are they just used for a cheap laugh?",
and " Is the word MIGHTY really used in every song ?",
and " Who played what instruments on what songs ?",
and " Who wrote what words ?", and " Who is the
audience ( or individual ) this rock opera is aimed at ?".
By now you've probably realized that unlike the passengers on
Comet Kansas, you are non-telepathic. Therefore, you must understand
enough to appreciate this song as an instrumental and muddle out
a meaning to this story on your own.)
14) Eternal Sol 3 Congress
My name is Herodotus and I declare this Eternal Sol 3 Congress
in order and open.
Herein all manner of debate is fair. You filibusters had better
beware because
We don't hold elected seats & we can all wait for eternity
to freeze.
Our great Comet Kansas has gathered today many new representatives,
Step forward please, people who didn't make history or fame,
Except for maybe Thomas McBane, wishing his taxes and mistress
were paid,
Praying that he has a chance to be saved.
Plato is waiting there by the door. He can help you out with all
the forms.
Kant will then place them in categories and hand them all over
to Madame Curie.
Consult with Freud if you have any worries. Forget about time,
schedules, and hurries.
Harriet Tubman will read the last minutes,
which sometimes take hours with all at attention.
Mahatma Ghandi will then take the stand to ask us to vote on a
daring new nation.
People on Sol 3 now have no choice. They must learn to speak with
one voice.
How can we motivate people today ? Without taking their free will
away ?
How can we encourage them to care for the earth ?
All the oceans & streams, mountains, and air ?
With a brand new system of reincarnation that should inspire positive
action.
Those who work for peace and change will be reborn in a golden
age.
Those who work for machines and lies will inherit a world with
poisonous skies.
Those who refuse to work and protect it will awake in a world
they have neglected.
My name is John F. Kennedy, and with this plan, I find I must
agree.
We need an outside agency, one which can fairly oversee.
My name is Clara Barton. Listen to me, I have a suggestion :
The InterGalactic Cross-Time Mind Control God Patrol !
15) InterGalactic Cross-Time Mind Control God Patrol
Welcome to the state of perpetual bliss here at the end of space
& time.
You can live ten million lives inside the mighty iceball Kansas.
Come into the cometary control center. Strap on this anti-gravity
belt.
Pin the cross-time field warp to your hat. Shake hands with Freud
& Cheops.
We have no bosses here. We take care of the lost sheep of all
worlds.
We bounce from planet to planet.
We will put the reins of history & progress into your hands.
Reach out with the tendrils of your feelings. Place all the suffering
in our heart.
Melt into centuries of countries, and deliver us from famine and
disease.
You & You & You & You are omnipotent. Bless the ones
who remain planetbound.
Break their walls !